Circumcision Anyone?

I've just added a new service to my pet spa. How would you like to have your dog bathed, brushed, trimmed and circumcised? The way I see it, those little wingdings are always in the way, and they don't use them properly anyway, so why not just whack them off?

Seriously, I did have a minor accident recently. I joke about it now, but when it happened I was so freaked out I could barely stand up. It's not the first time I ever nicked a dog, not even the first time I found a scrap of disembodied skin on the table afterwards. There's just something about that particular piece of anatomy that just gets under your skin. (no pun intended) I called Daddy #1 right away and tried not to bawl on the phone when I told him. He arrived with Daddy #2 ten minutes later (during which time I finished the trim and bandaged the owie, in that order because I'm obsessive and also a little priority challenged) (oh and also, I just refused to let that beautiful white Coton de Tulear see his Daddies with blood in his hair) and he tried not to bawl on his way to the vet. Then I tried to compose myself so I could groom my last dog of the day.

An hour later Daddy #1 called to say the pup was fine, no stitches needed and to apologize for being such a wreck. He also said that he would see me in two weeks (He's got two 11 year old Cotons and always brings them every other week) and he'd pay me then for both visits. I gushed over how nice he was to me and how sorry I was about the accident and no you may absolutely not pay me and please send me the vet bill. How sweet is this? The vet did not charge him for a visit. Naturally I thought he must be just saying that because he didn't want me to pay, so I called the vet. Sure enough--I am not making this up--the vet only charged $25 for the antibiotics and no office visit, no emergency fee. WOW! Well I said to the receptionist "There must be something I can do. Can I give you a donation?" No, she said If you want you can give them a card or something.

The next day--By the way I did finish my last dog that day without incident, though I did retire the bloody scissors for a couple weeks. Once they taste blood, you know... The next day I went to my favorite pet boutique (I have to walk past two others to get to it, that's how much I love this place) and I bought some doggie doughnuts and a nice card for them and a cold pack from the drugstore. So that was my care package. I hope it made the boys (all four of them) happy.

I'm so lucky to live and work in such a close neighborhood and to have clients who are so kind and generous. That night I had been invited to a petite soirée at the home of a client who I met in French class two years ago. We went because I was so touched that she had invited us, but I didn't think I would know anyone and I completely expected to feel out of place. How surprised was I when I met none other than the vet and his mother/receptionist who had treated my unfortunate little pup just the day before? I almost cried. Dr. S. came over to me and introduced himself and his Mom and said how pleased he was to meet the famous me. That's what he said... FAMOUS! I've only been working in this area for 2 years, and in my current location less than one year. They were so sweet and nice and ...I'm getting verklempt. Talk amongst yourselves. I'll give you a topic: Is global warming caused by a natural climate shift ending the last ice age, or pollution accumulating since the industrial revolution.....

Well anyway, the party was nice. Dr. S. eased my conscience saying that the cut was not that bad and he knew it would be fine as soon as he heard I was the groomer. I delivered the care package later that evening to the Daddies. Luckily I didn't have to go far. They both work at a chic restaurant around the corner. Those guys are so sweet to show there were no hard feelings they gave me a gift card to come to their restaurant.

This whole experience was far far different from what happened the last time I sent a dog to the vet. But that's another story. And don't sound so surprised. Every groomer has accidents. That's why we have insurance. And yes, if you are shopping for a groomer you may ask to see proof. If they seem reluctant, find another groomer.

Are you sure they said fifteen minutes?

If anyone watched the National Dog show on Thanksgiving day (it was on right after the big parade) you may have seen me. I was there in all my glory for about two seconds getting my book signed by the host, John O'Hurley. I should have a talk with those producers. Don't they know it's supposed to be fifteen minutes of fame? Did they not hear John O'Hurley say that I resemble Halle Berry? The nerve.

Congeniality

After the NEPGP show I wanted to send a thank you note to the show coordinators. They bent the rules for me and let me register late for the contest. When I say late, I really mean four hours before the start of the pre-judging.

Dear Lynn,

I want to thank you and the rest of the NEPGP gang from the bottom of my heart for letting me compete in the mixed and other purebreds class this past Sunday. I was thrilled and honored to have the chance to show off what I've learned since my first bichon contest last year. While I didn't place, I took home a treasury of information that I can't wait to practice. I've grown so much as a groomer and as a person in the last year, and I look forward to making NEPGP a part of my grooming and competing life well into the future. Everyone was so friendly and fun and helpful to me (Marea Tully, Shirlee Kalstone, Linda Claflin, Tony and Toni, Sue Zecco, Jay Scruggs, Mario DiFante, Randy Lowe, Julie Ostoski, Olga Zabelinskaya just to name a few). I even seeded some friendships with people close to my home in Philly, Kimmie and Alex from the model dog booth. The good will of the people in this industry still surprises me since there is so little collaboration or cooperation in my city. Hopefully, I can help to make it better by reaching out to groomers in my area. Overall, I learned, I had fun, I still haven't finished working on my model, Gwendolyn, but we've agreed I won't carry her by the nose any more as long as she doesn't jump off the table.

Best Regards,
J

That last bit about Gwendolyn has a back story. It shall be revealed to you in time. I have no idea if Lynn Boucher ever got that note, but I got the sweetest reply from Linda Claflin.

Dear Jaimie,

On behalf of the Board and members of the New England Pet Grooming Professionals(NEPGP), we welcome you! You will receive your 2008 packet later. Thank you !

Also, thanks for the nice note you wrote to Lynn and members of the staff at the Fall Fest. Those nice notes really energize us to continue our quest for excellence!

All the best--Linda cc

Linda C. Claflin

New England Pet Grooming Professionals (NEPGP )-Show Coordinator

WOW!

I guess it pays to be bold. Here's a response to my letter to J2. It's like getting a personal letter from Julia Roberts.

Hi J, sorry it took me so long to get back to you. I meant every word, you have a lot of talent and a very good eye, keep up the good work. Stick with O for now and when you get down here give me a buzz. O has a very good eye also and a lot of talent, her Bichon profile is very good, she just has to work on her finish work, that will come with experience. She is very good, and you have the same potential. I wish you had lived down here when I still had the shop and was looking for a student. Anyway keep at it hopefully I'll hear from you soon and see you in the competition ring real soon, good luck J2

That's so cool!

In the Category of Inappropriate....

A letter to a very well known grooming empress:

Dear J2,

I hope I'm not being too bold by tracking you down. My name is J, we met at NEPGP. I was toting around a bichon model all weekend and I competed with O's bichon, Tiffany. Thank you for the kudos on my styling. I really tried hard to apply all the things I learned from you. You were very encouraging, which was nice since I didn't place. Thank you. The reason for this email is that I'm looking for private lessons. I would love to learn from you, but I know you're probably too busy, besides which I'm only in Florida once or twice a year. But if you know anyone near Philadelphia who might be interested in taking on an eager and humble student, please pass on my info. I have a difficult time doing this on my own because I can't have a dog right now and I have to depend on my clients for practice. I don't really know anyone in bichons right now except O, who is helping me as much as she can but she is not that near by. I have improved greatly since my first contest last year, and I'm aching for a trophy.

Best Regards,
J

Yes, I did send it. No, she did not reply.

Welcome!

Welcome to Hair of Ze Dog! My name is J I'll be your cruise director for this evening. I started this journal to share some of the ups and downs of my grooming empire....Well it's not an empire yet, but in a few years maybe it will be. What would John Stazko do? Ahem... I don't know what came over me? When my dogs leave my salon I want them to look like they are ready for the ring at Westminster. That is my goal every. time. But I'm still learning. And basically, aren't we all? As a groomer--I mean pet stylist (that's what you have to be now or whenever someone asks you what you do their first response will always be 'You're a what??') As a pet stylist I reach out to anyone I can (to an annoying level probably) to learn as much as I can about making dogs happy and beautiful. So if you are a pet stylist and you are better and more famous than me please share.

My pet styling career started long before I knew I wanted to be a pet stylist. Really. I just needed a job. I had just moved back to Philly after my first attempt at living on my own had sort of back-fired, I had no job and no place of my own. The only things I had were an alcoholic boyfriend who had me living with him at his mother's house and a storage bill as high as the rent on a two bedroom apartment back in my home town. My job search led me to every crummy retail dump in the neighborhood. You can judge if you want, but I knew that as soon as I found a job I'd start apartment hunting, and as soon as I found an apartment I'd dump the alcoholic. I mean really, here was a guy who would get so drunk every night he couldn't remember what you said five seconds ago.

I didn't know the area well, so I just got on the widest road I could find that wasn't a highway and drove. About ten miles up (that means north) I found a shopping center the likes of which I had not seen since I left the suburban wonderland that is San Antonio. I pulled in. This was familiar. Target, Lowe's, Barnes & Noble, and international-pet-retail-chain. My friend back home had said something about international-pet-retail-chain and lots of money and animals, so I went in. I was hired almost on the spot as a "pet care specialist", and later became a bather in the salon. The deal was that I would go away to grooming school (fine with me, it would ease my break-up from afore boyfriend) then return for apprenticeship.

As I said before, I just needed a job. I thought this would be a good way to make good money and have a flexible schedule so I could go back to school. I was absolutely right. As a fully fledged groomer I made great money and could change my availability as necessary to fit my college class schedule. But here's the thing: I got hooked. Yup. Absolutely completely hooked on the dog hair. I think I must have gotten a hair splinter in my sinus that somehow migrated into my cerebrum and stimulated the opioid receptors in my thalamus. Damn hair splinters...

So here I am five years later. Stay tuned for stories of my craziness.